Christmas Eve

Had a lovely Christmas Eve afternoon buffet with Christy and her family. It was so nice to see all of them again, and the food was amazing! I left full, but they even sent me home with a slick of Raspberry Champagne Cake! I’m glad they did too, because it was so light, and delicate, and so very tasty!

I also did a little cleanup yesterday before heading out, which resulted in a bit of a kitchen cleanup and rediscovery my old but awesome little dining table. I still remember getting this for my very first apartment in St. Paul. Picked it up from JC Penny for less than $100. The chairs haven’t held up quite as well, but I’d say the table has done quite well over the last 20 years.

Thank you to everyone who sent me a Christmas card! It’s great to be remembered and get holiday wishes from both near and far away. <3

I didn’t do a good job of prepping for Christmas myself this year. While I did get Christmas gifts down to my nieces in Florida, that only happened because I had that all worked out way ahead of time. I didn’t get a single holiday card out this year, so if you didn’t get one, it’s not personal. No one did.

I haven’t wanted to turn this into complaint central, but it’s been a really rough winter for us. Since my birthday, it’s been pretty much all I can do to just keep trooping through day by day. Work has been rough. There’s been a lot of change this year and it takes time for things to settle. I haven’t done a good job of work/life balance either. It’s not that I work long hours, but I don’t balance my focus, so even while I’m not there I’m still thinking about it. I’m also just really feeling the winter blues this year. Winter has always been rough for me, but this year it hit like a truck. Feels like all of a sudden the sun is gone and its super cold. I wake up without sun, work through the day, then it’s getting dark as I come home. It’s hard not to just come home and go to bed, but I really don’t want to sleep my life away.

I’ve been trying to keep myself busy in order to stay awake past 7 PM. There’s so much unfinished here at the house, and I think that bothers me more than I’ve wanted to let on. So I’ve started to make a more determined effort to get some little things finished - like filling the gaps in the wood floor. I’m also now starting to tackle some bigger things, like the mess that is our downstairs. I’m starting to get stuff cleaned up and sorted through in order to get that space finished. (The new subflooring is on its way!) There’s a lot to do down there, and we’ll have to watch the spend, but I’d really like to see that as a nice livable space before Spring is here.

Martin’s also been staying at his dad’s place the last few weeks, to help out his sister in caring for his dad. His sister’s been the main care-giver for his dad since he got out of the hospital and nursing home earlier this year. That’s super hard, especially when you still need to work and live your own life. I’m really glad that he’s doing that to help. I feel like Martin’s either all in or not in at all, so for him to really help out, I think this is what he needs.

That’s made it pretty lonely here for me, especially over the holidays. Poor mom & dad haven’t heard so much from me since… probably ever. While Martin and I never really celebrated much for Christmas or New Year’s, it’s hard to be without him. While we don’t really do Christmas gifts, we’ve seen the New Year roll in together for what seems like forever now. We’d sit up playing games or watching stuff, and have a little New Year toast & kiss as midnight came and then go back to whatever we were doing. It doesn’t sound like much, but it’s always meant a lot to me. Not sure yet what I’ll do without it.